Unconstitutional Obamacare And The People That Love It

This idiot on www.neogaf.com, who goes by the pseudonym "empty vessel" (a propos?), responded to "[Obamacare will be implemented with] the compassion of the IRS, the efficiency of the post office, and the incompetence of Katrina." with the following stupid-assed rhetorical question:

Forget about the probability that this imbecile pays for and will continue to pay for insurance from a "private" company, the irrefutable fact that this sub-100-IQ, dense, empty vessel doesn't think about (or he does, but doesn't disclose, probably to avoid facing the reality of an argument implosion):

1. The government is the one making the rules.
2. They make them up as they go along.
3. The government hates competition.
4. Obamacare is not the government providing your insurance, they are simply compelling (forcing?) the insurance companies to provide it to you.

But, I'll humor this fool. Even based on his false premise that the Fed is actually providing insurance, shall we use a football analogy that would work in either case?

Take your most-hated nemesis team in the NFL playing against your team. Instead of your nemesis team being called by their true team name, we shall call them the "Federal Government Stealers", or "Thieves" for short, and instead of your favorite team's name being what it truly is, we'll give it the name "Private Insurers", or "Insurers" for short. It's game time.

Now, for the coin flip!

The Insurers call "tails". It lands on tails.

The referee asks the Insurers "kick off or receiving?"

The Thieves' captain, Stretch Pelosi, then pipes up, "Whoa. They called "tails", which means we get "heads", and there is a "head" on that eagle on that there coin. It's OUR call to receive, or not only will I sanction you, Mr. Ref., but I'll fine every damned one of you Insurers, as well. Oh ... by the way, I'll take that half-dollar coin you just flipped, thank you very much."

Ref: "Thieves to receive!" [whistle blows]

Insurers kick the ball to Thieves' five yard line. The kick-returner catches the ball, runs backward into the end zone, and downs it. 

The whistle blows. "Safety!", yells the Ref.

Thieves' Coach Soetoro, ("Coach Harry" for short) rushes the field, "Nope. Our ball on the Insurers' 20 yard line. Ah ah ah! Don't complain! I'll sanction, fine, and imprison you. Now, where was I? Oh, yes. Special Teams, on the field for a field goal attempt!"

The crowd, Insurers, and ref shake their collective heads in disbelief, as it is still the first down, yet, they're going for a field goal? Kind of stupid, but hey, this is the Federal Government we are talking about here, so it is not that surprising after all.

"Hike!"

The kick is up! And ... it's ... 2 yards short! A pathetic, albeit usual performance from the Federal Government.

Coach Harry rushes onto the field, "No! No! No! Crew! Move that damned goal post up five yards, NOW! Do over! And YOU, you dirty Insurers, you BETTER start playing by the rules!"

"Hike!"

The kick is up! A-a-a-a-a-and it's short again!

"I don't want to enforce that particular rule just yet.", screams a whiny Coach Harry as he crosses his arms and stomps his left foot up and down six times.

"Game over! Insurers? Disband! You can no longer play here. Furthermore, you must pay our salaries from here out, and pay for our fans' hotdogs, popcorn, beer and cotton candy. Now GTFO."

You do see where this is going, right? Right. This is why private insurers say they can't compete, empty vessel, you jackass.

Stupid, idiot, hack, lunatic, kook-fringe, filthy, left-wing extremist bloggers. Ya gotta love 'em. They really make this entirely too easy.